Thursday, July 1, 2010

The score

I am a little on the obsessive side (I love you forever if you just said, "I totally wouldn't have guessed that."). By obsessive, I mean one of my habits was featured on Intervention (you know that show on A&E where they feature a person who needs intervention because they are ruining their lives by drinking, drugs, eating disorder...whatever). My habit wasn't actually the intervention because this girl had an eating disorder (I love to eat), and was going out all the time (I hate stinky bars). But, in the introduction her friend was talking about how she had been a little "Mary Homemaker" (before the self-destructive behavior) and the friend said, "She even had her menu planned and posted on the refrigerator, I mean who does that?" Well, I do. Apparently, that makes me one small step from snapping and shunning all responsibilities for the life of a super skinny party girl.

So back to my obsessiveness. I have this unspoken contest with Walmart (pretty sure they don't even know about it). If things work out in my favor I get a point. If it works in theirs, they get the point. Pretty simple. The score this summer is 2-1, advantage Walmart. My point came when I presented a coupon for a free shampoo and the checker took off the maximum amount instead of the cost (giving me $1.03 over).

In that same trip, I missed getting one of the bags leaving a pool test kit (important to the health of my monkeys) and my DH's deodorant (important to everyone). So, I spent the $1.03 in gas to go the 20 miles round trip to retrieve my already paid-for items. Did I mention that it was only one hour later and they had RESHELVED it? I think the big W is making a lot of money doing this "forgetting." That was one point for the big box.

The next point came yesterday. Small monkeys distract me at the register, so I don't really pay that much attention. So, imagine my surprise when I was opening the bag at home and found Elmer's Spray Glue? I questioned the kindergartner and Cubscout (they didn't know where it came from). Then I had a thought, "What if, I didn't actually pay for this? That makes me a SHOPLIFTER!" I would have to take it back and tell them the mistake. But then, I found my receipt and there it was. I didn't inadvertently STEAL. I did, however, pay for and take home something I didn't need. Nicely played Walmart, nicely played.

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