I am very sorry about everything you had to endure today. I know the trip in the carrier was terrible (evidenced by your constant cries from the confines of "the box"). I know I handed you over to that meany vet tech (she always talks extra nicely right before she makes you swallow something awful/holds you down for a shot and should not be trusted). I know your hopes of being a mother have been dashed. And I know at heart you are a wild cat, and it is killing you to be unable to jump on me like a ninja. So once again, I am sorry. Please don't hold this against me and take it out on my shoes (or any other of my belongings for that matter).
Your "owner" (we all know you consider yourself to be an equal to all but the kindergartner),
* Rosie just never stuck so we all started calling her Meowmeow (I think you would concur with the name change, if you were at my house during a thunderstorm).